Firm in Faith

Mathew Barnett quotes “Faith is believing God will take you places before you even get there”

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© thinglass – fotolia_53534014

 

 
Faith is powerful.  Faith is believing. To have faith is to be strong. To have faith is to live today and look forward to tomorrow. I am a person of faith. Faith in the religious sense and faith in the spiritual sense. My belief is that there is a God above and that when I submit to his care, nothing can go wrong. That everything has a reason and every event is part of a larger plan. Like different colored threads still in the making, these events are being knit together to create the perfect picture.
There are many things I still don’t get. I don’t know why some days are sad and what good fortune or role it will play later. But there are also events, really depressing moments, which in time has proved itself to be an unforeseen, unexpected and wondrous victory.

This is one such story.

It started with college placements. Being a girl of pride, I just had to be selected in one of the barons of  the fashion industry. So, I opted only for the best, which in my case would’ve been Tommy Hilfiger, Arvind Brands, Puma, Jockey, and Pantaloons. The initial stage usually is being hand-picked based on the resume submitted. I was selected for all the above. The next step was clearing a GD (Group Discussion) round amidst ten or sometimes twelve people; an awful, screaming mob, trying to play a soprano to make themselves heard. Being well- versed, yet soft spoken in nature, I edged my way forward through all of them. And lastly, I sat for an interview round with all the companies, which I thought went rather pleasantly. So needless to say, when I didn’t get selected for any of them, not a single company, I was heartbroken and my confidence shook bad.  I didn’t see the sense in the cruelty of having gone through each stringent process, till the very end, only to have been rejected by all.

 I was instead, repeatedly called by ECP Company, from Chennai to be their Retail Merchandiser. (It’s something to do with retail. Never mind the details.) Highly apprehensive of landing in the most unexpected of places, I decided to roll up my sleeves and give it my best. However, after just 2 weeks, I still didn’t understand why I had landed a job with a coveted designation, but almost no job description. My days went doing literally nothing, from 9am-6pm. If I was ever asked to do anything, it was nothing more than what some would call ‘donkey work’ under a boss, who was extremely ill-bearing in nature and very wrongly presumptuous of herself.  So, I talked myself to stay there day after day, and try to make things right. I told myself that I needed to prove my capability to this woman, who was more than difficult and giving me eye-swollen looks that stomped on my ego and thoroughly made me doubt myself. She would ask me for x and when I brought it to her, she’d yell back saying, “I asked for Y”. She’d keep me uninformed of official happenings around. I wasn’t ever emailed or cc’d/marked on events and if I was unaware when she spoke about it, she would tell me ’you need to be involved in the process and find out. ‘ Through-out the first five months, I was never expected to send official emails, until directed by her, and on the sixth month, she gave me hell for not following up, not being proactive and not doing my job.

I  became a nervous-wreck. Every day was a pain. In the mornings, I was more pathetic than a four year old, crying about having to go to school. Except that I was 23 and not 4. I didn’t have the liberty to cry.

During my idle days, I unconsciously started reading up on the internet. Reading led to writing, and the writing initiated this blog, until others began to take notice and I had to quit. Because idle or not, you’re not supposed to do “anything else”, no matter how simple or innocent or skillful, during those lousy office hours. Having always been a vivacious reader and an avid writer, I constantly thought how wonderful it would be to do what I love for a living. So I registered for a creative writing course online. I tried writing –after work of course. And I started applying to content writing companies. All of which, rejected me after my sample work. My confidence as a writer faltered. I couldn’t quit until I’d found another source of bread and butter.

The Bible has a wonderful verse, that my cousin once marked out for me. “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31. By then, I’d been in that God-forsaken place for 7 long months. Once again, I didn’t see the sense in what was happening. My faith stood, but I was becoming weary and started losing hope. I was angry and stopped caring about anything at all.

Until one January, An opening for a feature writer turned up. I applied. I got called. Without any anticipation and no hope, I went to their office. I had no published work and no professional background in the field. I showed all I could which was my blog that I’ve been carefully piecing together over the months. I was asked to rewrite an article as an assignment for the interview. It was a Saturday. By Monday, I was called to join. The very same Friday I resigned, and very soon I was relieved from work.
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What happened those few weeks was nothing short of a miracle. Eventually everything made sense. I was marked out for ECP. Had I been anywhere else, I wouldn’t have had plenty of time on my hands and rediscover my passion for writing. I didn’t get into companies that I’d applied for, because my true calling was in creative article writing.And I couldn’t have landed a more perfect job. I had to be under a difficult person; else I wouldn’t have appreciated my new team and their encouragement. I would have taken everything for granted. Today, after a rather long nightmare, I’m so very pleased to say that I am a Feature Writer for an upcoming luxury magazine. Despite not having any experience or articles to my credit, my wait and continuous effort for my passion has paid –off. Above all, my faith in God has paid off. 


This isn’t a confession to draw attention to religion or masquerade as a saint. It’s just to bring to light my story of how faith saw me through. For your faith heals you.
And I can only so heartily pray and be reminded everyday that “Faith is being sure of what we hope for and what we do not see”Hebrews 11:1
Amen.
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